Insert Title Here
by angua27
Summary: LoTR/HP (of course) STORY FINISHED A semi-normal fic that puts the hobbits in Hogwarts. I just wrote it to put together some scenes I thought would be fun. Hope you enjoy.
1. Through the Fire to the Shire

Insert Title Here  
By: Angua27  
  
A/N: This is one of my few semi-normal fics. Most of the people are at least basically in character. Sorry I Harry and Sam talk so little, but I can't get the hang of writing them. However, I do love writing Pippin. He's so cool! Oh, yeah, and I don't own any of them because JKR and Tolkien got to them first. Grrr... Hope you like!  
  
  
Chapter 1: Through the Fire to the Shire   
(hee hee, that rhymes!)  
  
"So what exactly does this spell do?" Ron asked cautiously  
"It opens an interdimensional passage using floo powder to travel to other worlds," Hermione explained carefully as she flipped through an aging brown book.  
"Are you sure it's safe?" he asked.  
"Of course it is. Otherwise it wouldn't be in a book."  
Harry and Ron exchanged a disbelieving glance. They remembered the polyjuice potion that had turned Hermione into a cat their second year. They both knew that a lot could go wrong despite Hermione's religious belief in books.  
"Okay. I think I've got it," Hermione explained excitedly. She stepped back and threw a handful of the charmed floo powder into the fire. For a moment, it flamed the usual green, but immediately switched to a towering blue column.  
"C'mon!" Hermione called and stepped into the fire.  
Harry and Ron shared another look, but reluctantly followed their friend.  
  
~~^~~~^~~~~~^~~~~  
  
Frodo Baggins, Samwise Gamgee, Meriadoc Brandybuck, and Peregrin Took were about to leave Bag End at Fatty's house. They were just about to step out of the door when a rushing noise erupted from Frodo's front room.  
"Ow!" shrieked a voice.  
The four hobbits stared in believe at the roaring blue fire and the girl that was now trying to squeeze out of his fireplace.  
"Frodo, you never told us you kept young ladies in your fireplace," Merry chided.  
"You could have at least shared a bit," Pippin added.  
"I don't keep people in my fireplace! I don't know how she got there."  
"Sure, that's what they all say," Pippin muttered.  
Sam was too busy watching the girl to join in the conversation.  
"Sorry," she said getting to her feet. "I didn't - ouch!" she gasped whacking her head on the ceiling. She stepped gingerly down from the hearth. "I didn't realize your fireplace would be so small." To her, this seemed to explain everything.  
"Ow!"   
"That's Harry," she explained. "Watch your head!"  
"Thanks, Hermione," Harry muttered rubbing his head.  
"I'm Hermione," she bubbled turning back to the hobbits. She grabbed Sam's hand and shook it hard.  
"OW!"   
"And that's Ron - Ron Weasley," she squealed. "Ron, watch your..."  
"Ow!" Ron, being the tallest of the three, hit his head the hardest and collapsed onto Frodo's table.  
"Sorry," he mumbled pushing parts of the splintered wood out of the way. He scrambled to his feet again, this time being a bit more careful.  
"My table..." Frodo moaned.  
"My back..." Ron moaned.  
"Anyway, as I was saying, I'm Hermione and this is Harry and Ron. We're from a different dimension and I was just trying this spell to get into another world and obviously it worked 'cos we're here and you're not like us. I'm sorry but actually I'm not sure about anything here. I don't even no if you speak English so you see..."  
"Hermione," Harry said quietly. "Shut up."  
"Well, um, hi," Frodo started. "I don't get many interdimensional travelers coming through my fireplace, and breaking my table. So anyway, do you want any tea?" he glanced suspiciously at the still-blue fire.  
"That would be lovely," Hermione said.  
"Great, then. Oh, by the way, I'm Frodo, this is Sam, Merry, and Pippin."  
"Why am I always last?" Pippin whined. "Frodo should be last once."  
"Oh, Ron," Hermione called. "You probably shouldn't -"  
But it was too late. Ron had already aimed his wand at the ruined table. "Reparo!" he said.  
Instead of the table rearranging itself into perfect condition, it was now advancing menacingly on Ron.  
"Impedio!" he cried. This only succeeded in turning the table orange and giving it nasty-looking spikes.   
"Through the fire!" Hermione yelled. Ron wasted no time in squeezing through followed immediately by Merry and Pippin. Harry and Hermione ushered the other hobbits through and followed quickly.  
They arrived back in the Gryffindor Common Room and flattened themselves against the wall. Sam needed help standing because he was dizzy from the trip.  
They watched the fire as it seemed to reach toward them. It extended its flames nearly two feet into the room and then suddenly extinguished.  
The seven of them stared at the empty fireplace.  
"Well, that was fun. Let's go home," Pippin said, but everyone was paying attention to Hermione instead.  
"WHY did you do that?!" Hermione gasped (*gasp*) at Ron.  
"I was trying to fix his table. I don't know what happened," he protested. "I even spellotaped my wand before we left."  
"Didn't I tell you not to do magic? I can't believe..."  
"No! No, Hermione, you didn't tell me."  
"Oh. Well, you shouldn't have anyway," Hermione sighed dejectedly. "We didn't know how magic would react in a different world."  
"You do now," Merry said.  
"I'm so sorry," Hermione began and tears slid down her cheeks. "But it's okay. We'll just use the spell again and you can be home by morning."  
"Um...Hermione?"  
"What Harry?" she spun around to see Harry holding out a very charred-looking book.  
"Oh, no," she mumbled.  
"We can just go find the spell somewhere else, Hermione. This can't be the only book it's in."  
Hermione shook her head and pointed to the burnt lettering. It read: "Four Hundred Spells You Can't Find Anywhere Else."  
Sam, who was listening intently to their conversation, piped up. "So you're saying you can't get us back to the Shire?"  
"I don't know!" Hermione shrieked. The males in the room (i.e. everyone else) backed as far away from her as possible.  
"Um...obviously nothing else is going to happen now, so maybe we should just try to get some sleep tonight," Frodo suggested.  
"Great idea!" Ron agreed, thankful for Frodo's compassion toward Hermione. Ron smiled at him and helped guide a shaking Hermione to her room.  
  
  
Okay, that's it for now. I'll have more soon people. R/R because I love reading reviews. If you can think of a good title tell me, 'cos I hate thinking of titles. 


	2. Dumbly Meets the Hobbits

Insert Title Here  
By: Angua27  
  
A/N I don't actually call Dumbledore Dumbly in this chapter, but I don't think of him any other way. This is just kind of a fun chapter, but I'm not sure if it helps the plot at all. As a matter of fact, as of now I don't even know what the plot is. Hmm... no wonder I don't have a title yet. Although I've sent numerous bribe letters to JKR, I still do not own anyone in here (except Professor Schaf, but she's not exactly a developed character. Did you know Schaf means "sheep" in German?) and Tolkien still has all the hobbits.  
  
Chapter 2: Dumbly Meets the Hobbits  
  
"Breakfast!" Pippin shouted jumping out of Ron's bed and onto Ron.  
"Oh," moaned Ron, holding his side. Anyone who has a younger sibling knows it doesn't really matter how big they are when they land right on your ribs. Ron realized this immediately. He pulled himself up off the floor and watched Harry as he too braced himself against the wall.  
"You can smell breakfast from here?" Harry asked groggily.  
"Yup!" Pippin answered. "Eggs, bacon, pancakes..."  
"Orange juice, waffles..." Merry added.  
"Potatoes," (a/n Don't you love how they say potatoes in the movie? When I get the DVD I'm going to tape their voices.)  
"Bagels." (a/n I'm running out of breakfast foods.)  
By this time the two younger hobbits were nearly down the steps.  
Harry and Ron hastily pulled on their school robes and hurried after Merry and Pippin, with Sam and Frodo close behind.  
Hermione met them shortly after in the Great Hall. Her eyes were red and puffy, but she seemed to be in a much better mood.  
"Today Ron, Harry, and I have to go to classes but I'm sure Harry could lend you his cloak so you can do some research in the library.  
"Yeah! You'll love Harry's cloak," Ron assured them.  
"Why? What does it do?" asked Merry between mouthfuls.  
"It makes you invisible," Harry answered quietly.  
This did not have quite the effect he'd hoped for. Sam practically spit out his orange juice and Pippin actually stopped eating.  
"It wasn't made by some Dark Lord that wants to rule the world, was it?" Frodo asked suspiciously.  
"Not that I know of," Harry replied.  
"Are you SURE, because I had this ring..."  
Hermione suddenly sprang to her feet. "Hello, Professor!"  
Sam turned around and did a double take.  
"Gandalf?" he asked.  
The white-haired wizard looked down at the hobbit. "Who?"  
"Oh, sorry..." he mumbled, turning red.  
"I was just stopping by to meet your new guests. Where are you from?"  
"The Shire," Pippin answered.  
"In England!" Hermione added quickly. "They live with muggles normally."  
"Yes, muggles!" Sam said catching on.  
"I've not seen muggles that look like you," Dumbledore prodded.  
"Well, of course not," Merry said knowledgeably. "Muggles are nearly nine feet tall."  
Hermione collapsed in her seat.  
"And have five heads," Pippin added.  
"Green skin."  
"And four - no - five eyes."  
"With sharp fangs."  
"And all muggles look like this?" Dumbledore asked.  
"Not all," Merry said. "Some have horns."  
"My question is, do each of their heads have five eyes or do they have one eye on each head?" Dumbledore continued.  
"Five eyes to each head," Pippin answered. "So they can see you better."  
"Ah," said Dumbledore as if a great mystery of life had been explained. His twinkling eyes turned to Hermione.  
"And you are sure this is accurate?" he asked.  
"Um...more or less," muttered Hermione.  
"Alright, if you say so," he said, casting another glance at Pippin and strode away, whistling.  
"Who was that?" Frodo asked. "He did look a lot like Gandalf."  
"That's Professor Dumbledore. He's headmaster of Hogwarts," Harry explained.  
"Think he's suspicious?" Hermione asked nervously.  
"No, Hermione," Ron said sarcastically. "What would have tipped him off?"  
"Well, that's good," Hermione said. Harry rolled his eyes.  
"You don't think the five-headed muggles made him suspicious at all?" he asked.  
"Why? How many heads do they have?" Pippin asked.  
"Only one," Hermione sighed.  
"But they do have five eyes, right?"  
"No, Pippin," she said exasperated. "They look just like everyone else, except you guys of course. I'm just so nervous now. What would Professor Dumbledore think if he knew we'd been doing this kind of magic? He'd never trust us again."  
"I dunno," Ron said. "But he would probably be relieved that you weren't hallucinating giant green-skinned muggles. Oh, and I like the 'we' and 'us' part."   
"Okay, okay, I get it," she said. "But we're going to be late and we still have to stop back at the common room."  
They all finished their breakfasts and hurried out, but Pippin and Merry managed to grab a few apples before they left. Sam chided them, but grabbed some fruit for himself once they turned their heads.  
The halls were already teaming with students as they made their way to the library.  
"There it is," Hermione pointed out hurriedly. "Just look for anything that might get you home. Now, we really have to get to Defense Against Dark Arts before Professor Schaf realizes we're late."  
"C'mon Hermione!" Ron called.  
"And make sure you wear the invisibility cloak, just to keep Madame Pince out of your hair. Bye!"  
"So what are we looking for?" Merry asked as they watched Hermione disappear down the hallway.  
"Anything that can get us home she said. A spell, I guess," Frodo said shaking out the invisibility cloak. "C'mon," he commanded and all four of them slipped under it unnoticed.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Next: Samwise dukes it out with Draco. Stay tuned!  
R/R 


	3. In the Library

Insert Title Here  
By: Angua27  
  
This didn't come out quite like I hoped, but I still had fun. Besides, there's lots of Pippin who has become my favourite character since writing this. Okay, still don't own anyone. You got it... Just r/r. That's all I ask.  
  
Chapter 3: In the Library  
(a/n I know, very creative)  
  
Pippin walked up to the table carrying a pile of books as tall as himself. They had decided to send Pippin out every now and then to retrieve new books because he was very tall for a hobbit and Sam said he'd strangle him if he kept singing. Not that Sam minded singing so much. In fact, he quite liked singing - he just didn't like Pippin's singing and he let everyone know it.  
After awhile, Frodo took off the invisibility cloak. He said everyone was beginning to loud anyway and they kept getting strange looks in their direction from confused students.   
"Ooh! Look at this!" Merry shouted.  
They swarmed around him to see if he found something.  
"How to Turn Your Enemies into Figs," Frodo read woodenly.  
"You could use that," Merry said to Frodo. "Or could have, at least."  
"I don't think we'll ever find anything," Sam sighed.  
"Here come Hermione, Ron, and Harry," Frodo said. "Maybe they'll be able to help."  
They told the three wizards how horribly their search was going.   
"Oh, well. I really didn't plan on finding anything to day anyway," said Hermione. "Maybe one of you can use the invisibility cloak and check in the restricted section."  
"Pippin'll do it!" Sam volunteered.  
"Of course," Pippin muttered and grabbed the invisibility cloak.  
"We have time before our next class so maybe we can - "  
"Well, would you look at that? Potter has got himself some new groupies. Expanding fan club membership?"  
"Didn't ever expect to see you in a library Malfoy. I didn't know you could read," Ron retorted.  
Draco ignored him and advanced on their table.  
"Moving up from house elves, are you? At least these wear proper clothes," he sneered looking directly at Frodo.  
"Don't you have anything better to do?" Hermione asked.  
"And where did you drag this one out of? He doesn't even have all his fingers."  
Harry stepped forward, but Sam was first. Draco didn't know he was facing someone who had fought much worse things than a Malfoy, but there was something unnerving about watching an angry hobbit approach.  
"Don't you talk about Mister Frodo like that," he shouted loud enough for Madame Pince to cringe. "Mister Frodo is stronger and braver than you'll ever be. You... you... ninny hammer. How dare you criticize him when you don't rightly know anything? You're... you're..." Sam trailed off and with a wordless shout he kicked Draco in the chin.  
Draco turned red from a mixture of anger and embarrassment, but slowly backed up.   
"You just... just... watch out Potter," he managed and then limped quickly out of the library followed by Crabbe and Goyle.  
"Way to go, Sam!" Ron said admiringly. Hermione collapsed in a chair laughing. Sam was turning quite red.  
"Who was that?" Frodo asked.  
"Draco Malfoy," Harry explained. "He tries to make my life miserable."  
"I think he has some orc ancestry," Merry observed.  
"Probably," Hermione said still laughing.  
"Where's Pippin?" Sam asked trying to change the conversation. "I thought he'd be back by now.  
  
~~~^~~~~^~~~^^~~  
  
As a matter of fact Pippin was reading. The books in the restricted section were much more interesting. So far he hadn't found any that told them how to get home, but he did find some that could make his stay much more interesting. The books themselves were interesting too. Sometimes he could swear they were talking about him. He was just opening up "Anti-Dark Lord Spells Made Easy" when he heard louder whispering in the next aisle.  
Anxious to actually catch the books talking he sped into the next row. Instead of vociferous books, he saw two identical red-heads searching the shelves.  
"I can't believe Professor Sprout gave us a pass into the restricted section," one of them said.  
"Yeah. She actually believed we wanted to learn more about the fire-fronded ferns."  
"I can definitely see why they'd be restricted. They should be restricted from herbology. My hand's hurt in 30 places. Dean Thomas had to go to see Madame Pomfrey."  
"I know. Hey, Fred! Check this out."  
The other boy walked over and read over his brother's shoulder. "'How to Enchant Unenchantable Objects.' Sounds promising."  
"Well then, use the replica spell," George said.  
Fred pulled out a sheet of paper and placed it on a spell in the book. "Repita!" he whispered and words formed on the paper.  
"Oh,hello," a voice said behind Pippin. It surprised him so much he screamed.  
"Ah!" screamed Pippin.  
"Ah!" screamed Fred and George.  
"Sorry," said Merry. "Well, I heard you so come on out Pippin."  
Pippin reluctantly pulled off the cloak and glared at his cousin.  
"Who are you?" Fred asked.  
"I'm Merry and this is Pippin."  
"Last again," Pippin mumbled.  
"Well, what - "  
"What do you think you're doing?" Madame Pince asked. The four of them looked guiltily at the librarian. She stalked over and snatched the book out of Fred's hand. "This does not look like 'Fronds of Fire: A Field Guide to Flaming Ferns,'" she huffed.  
"We were just doing some extra reading. To...er..."  
"Enhance our education."  
"That's the worst lie I've heard from anyone this year. I don't suppose you two could at least come up with something more original. Now give me those," Madame Pince snapped as she grabbed the papers Fred and George had been copying and ushered all four of them out of the restricted section.  
  
  
  
  
Okay, well, that's it for now. I'm planning on having one more chapter and that's it. Unless I get too sidetracked which I hope I won't because I don't think I have the patience to write much more. Reviews, PLEASE!!!!! 


	4. There and Back Again... Kinda

Insert Title Here  
  
By: Angua27  
  
Well, this is the end. I haven't got a lot of good feedback on this so I probably won't do one of these again. Normal fics are just not for me. *Sigh* I don't own anybody in this here yonder thither fic so don't flame me. About that at least. You can flame me about anything else though. Enjoy! R/R Oh! And come visit my community. It's www.communities.msn.com/LotRHPRoundRobin or if that doesn't work (I may have typed it in wrong) go to my ff.net profile and the links in there. Please join!  
  
Chapter 4: There and Back Again…Kind of.  
  
Madame Pince marched up to Ron, Hermione, Sam, and Frodo. "All of you, out. Now," she demanded. "You're lucky I don't give you all detention."  
  
"Thanks a lot," George hissed at Merry as they retreated. "We almost had the perfect new joke candy."  
  
"It was going to be unblockable!" Fred added.  
  
"And then you two had to come in and cock it up."  
  
"George!" Hermione exclaimed. "You should be a bit kinder to them. After all they're not from our dimension."  
  
"What?" the twins asked in stereo.  
  
"We're from Middle Earth," Pippin said superiorly.  
  
"Oh, at that just about explains everything," George said.  
  
"Look, we made a mistake…"  
  
"We?" Harry asked. "I remember being pulled along very specifically."  
  
"You would. Anyways, I guess it was Ron's fault because he shouldn't have…"  
  
"My fault? Look, I was trying to be helpful. You're the one that said 'Goody! We should visit another dimension because I can!'"  
  
"Alright already! My fault. I admit it."  
  
"We don't really care who's fault it was, honest," Fred said (a/n Grr! I hate writing Fred said, it reminds me too much of a children's reader.)  
  
"Do you suppose we could make interdimensional lemon drops?"  
  
"George!" Hermione huffed.  
  
"Actually, I find it quite a good idea." The nine of them turned around to see two wizards standing just down the hallway from them.  
  
"Frodo Baggins, you certainly have gotten too fond of adventures."  
  
"Gandalf!" Frodo exclaimed and all four hobbits surged toward him.  
  
"I didn't know Dumbledore had a twin," Ron whispered.  
  
"Maybe it's Aberforth!" Hermione exclaimed and then caught the confused looks around her. "Dumbledore's brother," she explained as though they should know these things.  
  
"Ah, right," Ron mumbled. "I'm sorry, I haven't gotten around to memorizing our headmaster's family tree yet. My mistake."  
  
"How did you get here?" Frodo asked.  
  
"I could ask you much the same question, but Albus has cleared up much of the story already."  
  
"Professor, how do you know him?" Hermione asked. "They're from different dimensions?"  
  
"Yes, Miss Granger, but you don't think you're the only one that's experimented with dimensional magic, now do you? My friend Gandalf has been traveling all over the, well, worlds for a long time now." (a/n He's a worlds traveler, worlds traveler…okay you have to read Voldie Goes to Mordor to even kind of get that.)  
  
"I must say though, I was quite surprised when I found that someone from Albus' world had apparently kidnapped 4/9ths of the Fellowship."  
  
"How did you know we'd come here?" Sam asked.  
  
"Well, the first clue was the disfigured table. Magic from this world acts very instable, yet still a little logically when used on Middle Earth. The fact that the table had become a bloodthirsty monster suggests that someone had tried to magic the table in some way. I also received a communication via one of Aragorn's old palantirs, useful things those are, from Albus saying that four strangers had shown up at Hogwarts. As soon as I could I came here."  
  
"So we'll be going home now?" Sam said hopefully.  
  
"Yes, Samwise. You'll be going home now."  
  
"However, I do think they could stay for dinner. Don't you Gandalf?" Dumbledore said looking directly at Pippin.  
  
"Of course, I don't see why not," he answered.  
  
**  
  
That evening, after they had all stuffed their faces, they stood outside Hogwarts castle.  
  
"I really wish you guys could have seen a Quidditch match. They're sooo cool," Harry was saying.  
  
"They sound fun," Merry agreed. "But it is about time we got home."  
  
"But it's only been a day…" Hermione said wistfully.  
  
"Perhaps you'd see it differently if you were the one stuck on Middle Earth," Gandalf pointed out.  
  
"Probably," Hermione said, but she seemed sad that her spell hadn't worked out as she'd have liked nonetheless.  
  
"I don't think we'd get on well there. The ceilings are too low for one," Ron added.  
  
"Maybe they can come with us, just to say goodbye, you know," Frodo suggested.  
  
"I don't see any harm in it," Professor Dumbledore agreed. "You could get us all back fine, couldn't you Gandalf?"  
  
"No problem there," Gandalf said.  
  
"Okay, then. That's settled. Now everyone gather in a circle," Dumbledore commanded.  
  
They stood in a circle as he had said and joined hands. Professor Dumbledore muttered something eight times that no matter how hard Hermione strained to hear, she couldn't make out.  
  
Suddenly, there was a flash of bluish light and they felt a sensation very close to being taken by a portkey, but much rougher. They landed, luckily on a patch of grass. The first thing they heard was "Oops."  
  
"Oops what?" Merry asked rolling over.  
  
"Oops Gandalf's not here, oops," Professor Dumbledore said sitting up. (a/n I know, I can't see him saying that either.)  
  
"Well, we'll go back and get him," Ron said.  
  
"I'm afraid it's not that easy," Dumbledore explained. "You see, our magic doesn't work here and his doesn't work there so…"  
  
"We're stuck," Harry finished.  
  
"And he's stuck," Frodo added.  
  
"Yes," said Dumbledore.  
  
"Hah!" gasped Sam  
  
Hermione shot him a dirty look. "What's that supposed to mean?" she asked.  
  
"Nothing really," he said. "Just thought it was kind of… you know… ironic."  
  
"Very ironic," Ron mumbled. "So what happened to the other wizard dude. What's his name again?"  
  
"Gandalf," explained Dumbledore. "Probably didn't come with the spell. I don't know why…"  
  
**  
  
Gandalf stood bewildered in the middle of Hogwarts lawn. "Fool of a… fool of a… well, fool of a something," he mumbled. "He only said it eight times! If I didn't know any better I'd think…" his voiced trailed off. It was going to take quite awhile to find a wizard who would be able to send him back to Middle-Earth. Meanwhile, Harry and his friends would be in Middle-Earth with Dumbledore very far away from Lord Voldemort, Gandalf couldn't help noting and Gandalf did realize he looked remarkably like the Hogwarts' headmaster. Gandalf shook his head and headed back towards the castle with a slight smile on his face. "Wizards," he whispered. 


End file.
